Culture Shock
by The Original Marisa
Summary: When Spike tries to teach the Autobots about Christmas, it doesn't go over as well as he planned. Icky HTML mistakes have been fixed.


A Belated Autobot Christmas Special

by Marisa

--

Author's Notes: "This was supposed to be posted on Christmas, but my family up and dragged me to Texas before I could get this poem finished XD; It really wasn't supposed to end where it did (the Decepticons were supposed to make an appearance, too) but had I forced it any further, it would have dragged on and gotten horribly boring. Perhaps I'll make a sequel next year if this goes over well. If any of the rhythm or rhyme seems off or jars you, feel free to point it out to me. Poetry is not my forte, but I wanted to make this special.

Now on to the story. I hope December 25th was a particularly merry day for you all!

---

The season came swiftly, in Thanksgiving's wake

And now was the time for the people to take

Some time with their family because, of course,

The Holidays hit Central City full-force

-

The snow wasn't falling, the ground wasn't white

But the spirit was present in all lines of sight

In the sights, in the sounds, in the general air

No one you asked denied Christmas was near.

-

One boy in particular we focus on now

Bringing the spirit where it could not be found

For young Spike had friends from a world far away

Who knew not of Christmas, its meaning and ways

-

He knew he should fix this, at least help them know

Of the spirit and joy that drifted like snow

And the cheer people felt, maybe even give some

In these hard times for them, so far from their home

-

So he told them about it, decorated HQ

Sung the songs, told the tales, both the fictions and truths

He was being straightforward, asking not what they thought

But continuing forth - any doubts he had not.

-

Spike's Autobot friends weren't sure what to say

Though the gesture was kind, the traditions were strange

And quite foreign to them, but they just rolled along

wanting not to insult him, they let the "cheer" be prolonged

-

With the month growing late and the season undying

The Autobots were losing their will to keep trying

to smile and nod as this madness went on

and each day grew more tense, wishing Christmas was gone

-

Finally came blessed Eve of Noel

Just a couple more days and all things would be well

Yet as the end ticked closer, their patience thinned fast

Even Prime wasn't sure how much longer he'd last

-

Prime's thoughts were cut short by approaching footsteps

He turned, finding Autobots in apparent unrest

Ironhide, Wheeljack, the whole team was here

And their angry narrowed optics showed no hint of cheer

-

Ironhide spoke first, his arms crossed at his chest

"Prime," he said bluntly, "we're all way too stressed.

'This whole Christmas thing, it's driving us nuts

'Spike's got to go, no ifs, ands, or buts!"

-

"Only to the end of the season, of course."

Gears' bitter tone had no guilt or remorse.

"Spike's a good kid and we like him a lot

'But this seasonal sweetness makes my circuts rot."

-

"All the carols and tunes, Spike never stops singin',

'I'm tellin' ya, Prime, my ears won't stop ringin'!"

For emphasis, Jazz placed his hands at his head

"One more stupid song and I swear I'll be dead!"

-

"I know that Spike's actions are somewhat annoying,

'but he's trying to share something that he's truly enjoying.

'Not to mention," Prime sighed, his demeanor dejected

"It's a part of Earth's culture and it should be respected."

-

"Respect, my exhaust pipe!" Sunstreaker said in a blink,

"He should respect us, and the things that we think!

'Those decorations of his, they look awful! And clash!

'He may be joyful, but I think it's trash!"

-

"Oh, come on, you guys," Bumblebee piped,

"Have you ever seen Spike – or any human – so hyped?

'There's something 'bout Christmas, making that cheerful trance

'Maybe we could catch on if we gave it a chance?"

-

Optimus nodded. "I have to agree

to at least let him celebrate it, Bumblebee

We'll all bear through Christmas, like it or not,

for just one more day--" he suddenly stopped.

-

Optimus' gaze fell beyond them, behind

and as they each turned around, their optics grew wide.

In the main lab's entrance, by the door, stood their dear

friend Spike. Prime choked, "How much did you hear...?"

-

"I heard the whole thing," Spike said, his voice low

"And I'm a bit more than angry, I'd like you to know

'that you'd play me like this, let me do all this work

'just so you could gripe and complain, you jerks!"

-

"Spike, please, just listen--" Prime tried to explain

"I already listened to you guys complain!"

"It's not that we didn't appreciate the show--"

"You just think I'm too fragile to hear you say no?

-

'I don't care if you think that my culture is cracked

'But you could have just told me before I busted my back

'Trying to get all this ready to help you understand

'The holiday spirit that resides in this land

-

'But forget it," snapped Spike, "I'll spend Christmas at home

'me and dad can watch movies or something alone.

'You're like family to me, I thought I could share.

'But it's not worth the effort if you guys don't care."

-

"Spike--"

"It's okay, you got your wish, Gears

'No more of those annoying holday cheers.

'Jazz, I'll stop singing, and Sunstreaker, please

'take all the ornaments you hate off the trees.

-

And before they could protest their friend Spike was gone

out into the desert for the long, long walk home

Bumblebee glanced around in disgust

"Thanks a lot guys, for keeping his trust."

-

And with that he transformed to the shape of a car

to give Spike a lift home -- the city was far

As the bug left the base, Wheeljack sighed.

"We really screwed up."

"Yes, we did," agreed Prime. 


End file.
